Look, I really am sorry. When I got stressed out just over 12 months ago now, and tapped into the Google search bar, 'How to do a blog', I never thought for one second I would go through the 'on-line literary mangle' that is the world of blogging. Since then, I have watched as others all around me seem to be have been so much better at this than me. One of the things that the great bloggers seem to always be doing, is a 'meme'. Essentially its like a 'viral' on-line QandA where you are required to answer questions on a theme, whatever it may be. You get tagged to take part, and then you 'tag' others to carry on. Needless to say, I have never been tagged ! That is … until now !!
So, thanks to the wonderful @TomBriggs79 for giving me the opportunity to have a go at one of these, although it would seem that this is the 'Mother of all Meme's' so I will start this now, and post it as soon as I have finished.
Firstly, there are a few rules I have to abide to..
1. You must post the rules
2. Post 12 fun facts about yourself in the blog post.
3. Answer the questions the 'tagger' has set for you, and then create 12 new questions for the bloggers you 'tag' to answer.
4. Tag 12 people and link them to your blog. (Here I will struggle massively!)
5.Let those you have tagged know about it.
So, 12 quirky facts about me.
1. I can't ride a bike! Never had one, never wanted one!
2. At the age of 10, I went on holiday to Magaluf, stayed in the Hotel Antillas Sol, and used to get into a daily daydream zone, get the lift to the top floor, stand at the open window of the landing, and in my head sing the Barry Manilow classic 'Copacobana'.(Actually, I sang it out loud once, and got caught by a chambermaid!).
3. I almost appeared on Channel 4's American Football programme in 1984/5 ish. I played for the 'Scouthead Skyhawks', and wrote in. The producers were dead keen to get us on, until they realised, it was just me and my mate Gaz,(as in that was the team!), and we were under 16, so weren't allowed in the studio.
4. I almost drowned when I was about 7. I was forced to go cockling on Heysham Head beach with my cousins, the tide came in and I had to get on my cousins shoulders to make it back. Never eaten cockles since. (Not that I ever did!)
5. I have appeared on TV three times that I am aware of. Once on It's a Knockout, (Oldham v Wigan v Wirral…. and yes Oldham won!), once on Atarah's Band, and once on Gardener's World live from The Three Counties Show.
6. I have probably appeared on TV four times actually, since I was snared by a Catalan Cable TV crew in a London pub, complete with a Spanish Pensioners Choir who had spent the day in Abbey Road Studios recording an album of songs by The Clash ! I ended up bearing my 'Bullfighting related Tattoo' and getting a rake of abuse from a 70 year old dear from Barcelona! (All captured on camera, and doubtless being shown on an endless loop on Catalan Cable TV!).
7. I wanted to do Travel and Tourism as a chosen Further Education path. I was desperate to work on the airlines, as my cousin was a chief purser on BA. I was told by my careers teacher I couldn't do that, as I wasn't Gay. How shocking were attitudes back then?
8. I once got lost on a school trip in 1984 outside the Moscow State Circus. (If you aren't aware, it's a circular building) the show ended, I walked the wrong way around the building, and around an hour and a half later finally came across my Chemistry teacher Mr.Topham, who cried when he found me ! Bless him !
9. I used to work in Blackpool, Bar Manager, Royal York Hotel. We worked a four day Christmas break, 17hrs plus a day, living on site. On the final day, as all the old dears left, I was dragged out of bed to wait on in the restaurant for breakfast. I omitted to put on a pair of 'Bill Grundys' due to fatigue, which would have been OK,only I put the wrong pair of pants on and spent the breakfast service 'Swinging Low Sweet Chariots' on account of the gaping hole in my 'Trizers'. (We got a raft of tips though!)
10. I wish I was a chef. I spent the best day of my life at the Rick Stein Seafood School in May 2010, and last time we hit Padstow, I went to a demo at the school with the man himself, to sample dishes from the 'Spain' series. There I met James, a 21 year old lad who was working side by side with 'El Maestro' , and I thought …. Why couldn't I have done that ? (In fact I got a bit squiffed on the free wine and asked him about 7 times, embarassing or what?)
11. I am a pretty frustrating person to have as a friend. I perpetually let people down in my attempts to try and please everyone , all of the time . It's a bit like that Christmas Dinner sketch off of the Vicar of Dibley, running between as many people as I can trying to be dead popular and make everyone laugh.(The list is endless… free Tenacious D gig, passed up etc etc).
12. My ol' man KG , sang in the pubs, and on stage in musicals, and he was very good! One newspaper review said 'KG sounded more like Elvis, than Elvis'. The thing is, I can sing too, and I just don't have the 'Cojones' to do it. This is my biggest regret… I never got to show KG what I could do….. and he wanted me to !
Flippin eck ! That was deep ! … Ok, here are my answers to @TomBriggs79 's questions.
1. The most memoarble place I have been… No Brainer … The Seafood School at Padstow. Whoever designed it was a genius.
2. I would change the end of any of the 8 million God awful American 'all comes good in the end for all us pretty, talented people who always see the good in everybody and believe that good will triumph over evil' films…. just saying !
3. Dream job… easy.. aside from a job at the Seafood Restaurant, it would be my Tapas bar, in the bowels of an Andalucian Plaza de Toros ! (as long as it was busy!)
4. Favourite smell….. Cut grass !
5. I don't have many extravagences, but I guess it would be, whenever we have a little spare cash, I splash out on cooking a really good meal.
6. If I were a condiment !!! ……. Well, how about 'Dave's Insanity Sauce', not because I am sizzlingly 'Hot' or anything, more like I am insane !!
7.My view on whether biscuits should be 'dunked' in a brew is clear. No they shouldn't. I love shellfish, but if I get one grain of sand in a mussel, I struggle to eat the rest. Bicuits dunked in a brew leave a crumbly residue which is the equivalent of a sandy mussel !
8. I can't condone violence, so I won't suggest you slap either Fran or Lee. (A firm poke in oppsing ribs, from behind, by surprise, accompanied with a yell of 'Electric Shock!' is however acceptable).
9. I am not a fan of scary movies. The one film that did freak me out as a kid was 'Empire of the Ants'. I went aged about 13, with my 19 year old cousin who was babysitting. I legged it out of Screen 1 of the Odeon, and she came to find me. The only other film showing involved some window cleaner 'confessing' about something. we didn't go to that either !
10. If I had to read one book from my childhood again, then I think it would be 'Stig of the Dump', not sure why, I just remember I liked it.
11. In total I have spent around an hour and a half completing this 'Meme'. As usual, once I start rambling, I just don't stop!
12. Tom, how could I possibly hate you for getting me to do this? It has allowed me to blog again, something which last week seemed a long way off ! So thanks !
So, onto the 12 questions I am going to pose… (pity the poor people who kop for this!)
1. What is the most bizarre thing you have ever eaten?
2. Do you have any phobias that render you a gibbering wreck?
3. What is the worst lie you have ever told?
4. If you could install any celebrity as Prime Minister, who would it be and why?
5. If you were allowed one record/cd single to take into solitary confinement for a year, what would it be?
6. What is the kindest act you have ever done to help someone else?
7. What is your most unusual skill ?
8. Have you ever lied to anyone who has asked you for 'spare change', and if so, why?
9. What is the funniest (non offensive) joke you know?
10. What has been your most embarrassing moment in public?
11. What was the worst present you have ever recieved?
12. In a straight contest between 'Fig Rolls' and 'Garibaldis', which gets your vote?
There you go, that wasn't too bad was it. All that remains now is for me to pick those I am 'Tagging' to take part…
I will let you all know individually, via Twitter.
That's it for now I think. Of course feel free just to have a go, even if I didn't give you a 'tag', it's not becaiuse I don't like you, it's just I am bursting for the loo !
Laters peeps ! FD :@)